“For a hired candidate, there are 19 who will be told no; 95% of them will refuse! “recalls Matthieu Degenève, CHRP, founding president of L’œil du Recruteur. According to him, most job seekers are still far from knowing how to react to a refusal. Here are a few tips on how to deal with the rejection of a candidate’s application.
Preparing for a refusal, which occurs more than 90% of the time, is about how to deal with legitimate and predictable emotions. It means anticipating the situation to avoid being surprised to feel anger, discouragement or sadness. For Matthieu Degenève, “blaming the bearer of bad news” opens the door to bitterness and can be detrimental to the job search. But you have to know how to settle down. “Give yourself 15 or 30 minutes (or 24 hours, why not!) to live this disappointment and avoid brooding over it indefinitely,” advises Sylvaine Pascual, creator of Ithaque Coaching.
Identifying what helps us
“Knowing what makes you feel better will help you overcome your disappointment,” says Pascual. Some people feel the need for an intense workout, others need to be surrounded by their loved ones, to talk about their experience. The idea is to know how to avoid any risk of a vicious circle blocking the resumption of action in the days to come.
In a sincere and open approach, contacting the recruiter again to ask what our strengths and weaknesses to be corrected were will help us improve our mastery of the interview. “I called back most of the candidates who had warmly thanked me for following up on my refusal to offer them another job,” says Matthieu Degenève.
The Benefits of Failure
In Scandinavia, as in the United States, failure is more a sign of daring than a synonym for shameful failure. For more than a hard blow to our self-esteem, failure has its benefits.
It builds confidence
In a culture of performance at all costs, we often forget that success is not a continuous sequence of victories, but a succession of failures and successes. Realizing that others also make mistakes and recover gives (or restores) confidence in our own abilities to achieve our goals.
It is a source of learning
Failure marks a pause: it offers the opportunity for an honest and benevolent return to oneself and creates the opportunity for a face-to-face encounter with a deep desire, perhaps not listened to enough so far.
It prevents real shipwrecks
Knowing “useful” failures, those that we learn to take advantage of, opens the door to improvement. In a culture of trial and error, failure makes it possible to analyse the reasons for failure and to consider more promising actions.
Failure is therefore a school whose first lesson is not to confuse our value with our mistakes!